Habesha "Individuality" - or the lack of it
Our blogger from the motherland dropped this on us for her second article and we have been patting ourselves on the back for doing such a good job in recruiting her. Damn! We are good. Ok, Ok... Damn! she is good.
By Marshet
You have truly nailed this prevalent issue on its head. Your observation is not far fetched from the truth and it’s definitely something that each and every one of us has experienced in one way, shape or form. Be that as it may, I didn’t see what you’d propose to change this. What could we all do to protrude from this “shadow lifestyle” and create a unique identity for each one of us? Any lifestyle maven with a solution (or lack thereof) to this inherent issue Marshet has posed is welcome to indulge.
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Very well put. I agree 99.9%, and here’s the 0.1% (well, you said we should not go with the ‘crowd’ so …)
I would like to say something about being happy with the larger group. A couple of years back, Timothy Kalyegira, a Ugandan journalist who visited Ethiopia on a few of occasions, wrote series of articles on Ethiopia. The first was very laudatory (http://www.ethioguide.com/aa-ethioguide/ethioguide/Fortune/Fortune42.htm#travel ), and obviously, very well received by Ethiopians. The second (http://www.ethiomedia.com/commentary/timothy1.html ) touched upon some of our shortcoming, and probably revealed that Kalyegira’s observation was too close to the surface (not that he claimed any more or less). Anyway, it’ll be fair to say that habesh found it too abrasive to appreciate.
I mention this because if people have never read these articles, they're related to the topic at hand, and kind interesting. And secondly because one of the virtues of Ethiopia which Kalyegira noted was the family fabric, that people were very close and supportive, which to me actually didn’t make sense. Later I had to stop and think of other cultures I have liven in, including African ones. Maybe it's the selection of places I happen to have liven in, but there is something to be said about Ethiopian family traditions - they're good (and perhaps this is a good time to put the disclaimer that I say this as a person who does not interact much with family ;-)
I notice that it has now become the norm to have a therapist or a counselor. Sometimes I see how these people need a professional help, but other times I feel their conversations would be better served by a friend or family member. I also notice that in interaction with people of western cultures that my relationships with people are, on the majority, very temporal, if not superficial. It’s not that I don’t enjoy their company or don’t care about them, but there’s this implicit understanding of “I’ll see you, if I see you, when I see you”. For Habeshas it’s more of “I’ll see you coz I’ll see you”. If a denbara habesha happens to falter, begir beferes tefiligo yiyazal.
Somebody once said that technology is growing too fast for culture. I agree. I think a lot of cultural sacrifices had to be made for the west to get to where it is. Perhaps Ethiopia is still at the point where development is tripping over culture on it way to progress. But it will be nice to see Ethiopia rise from its doldrums with good qualities in our culture and other development hand in hand … (Comment this)
Generalization seem to rule at most instances.....
what u say about dat?
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Comment on the strategy of opening business: you can take an Ethiopian investor the greatest idea for business (business plan) and they would turn you down 100% of the time but show them a cake shop that seems to have customers and they are willing to open another right next door. (Funny because they really don’t even know if its’ successful or not –because foot traffic is not the only indicator of profitability)
Keep on writing
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Your observations are interesting, however you will find the same carachteristics in many if nit most socitiesy. For instance if you go to Paris or Rome you will find that Americans gather in palces usually frecuenetd by Americans, and so forth for other nationalities.
You must also understand that we Ethiopians have also changed because of many histrorical and economic factors that have happened in the last thirty some years.
To emigrate might be a new phenemona for us, but it is not by any menas in the world. America is populated by migrants of whom we are the late comers.
We live in a global world and consciously or not we are globalized. As to some of the traits of the Ethiopian behavioral pattern, at least it is civilized. Individaulity need not be pushy or loud to express itself. Onre thing for instance Ethiopians are rarely confrontational, they might even seem to agree with you. You will only find out when they quietly abandon you and you find yourself alone.
I have a lot of respect and love for my compatriots because in real important matters they show a great sense of oneness. I saw two and half miliion people coming out to demonstarte in Adis without a single incident or misbehavior. During the voting process last May I observed million of people coming out to vote, the taxis were giving free rides, I saw a backer distributing his bread for free, neighbors were giving water and other help to those lined up for voting, all this without a single incident, even with provacation by woyane supporters.
I say that when it matters our people are very good. If we are odd smetimes, let it be.
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