aqumada

Nothing beats watching the crazy Aussie on Animal planet who calls himself Steve. This guy would be walking around peacefully (ager Tena belo …eyafuache menamen) and he would somehow [wink wink] run into the most dangerous snake in Australia. Any sane person would scream and run away to the opposite direction. No…Not Steve…. Steve jumps the snake and holds it by the neck while at the same time trying to tell you the snake's biography (yet endetwelede…abatu men endeneberu nefsachewen yemarewena… menamen). Even the snake must be thinking, what a crazy ****? "yehenE" the snake was probably in the middle of buna or whatever snakes do, casually saying to his wife "bunawen tolo bey... teteche hejE lenadef", when rudely interrupted by Steve. Thanks to modern civilization and the craze with low-fat diet, ye zendero snakes do not have to take up a defensive position at all times.Besides, no one is crazy enf to jump them (so they thought).  The snake, then, somehow escapes Steve's grip and launches himself to bite Steve on the nose. Steve would not be too impressed. He would just slightly move his head and makes a comment like "wooow…it is a feisty one" [bakeh atqeled mehonu new]....gud gud ayen zendero belalech ayatE

Abeshas, on the other hand, are the antithesis of Steve. We are terrified of animals unless they are donkies. Donkeys!? We just breed [most numbers next to China] them and "curse them"…"invent teretena mesalEs to trash them..wezeterfe". Animals such as dogs are another story. If we see a dog from a distance, we would change direction and cross the street to avoid it (sorta like white ppl do when they see black people). I attribute this sort of reaction to the scary looking dogs that chased us all over the freaking neighborhood when we were kids. In Ethiopia, if we go to visit relatives or friends, on approaching the gate to their house, the first sentence that comes out of our mouth is "ezih bet wesha ale?" The residents would reply (almost all the time), "don't worry…Bobby aynakesem" come on in. Without waiting for your response, they would push you inside adding the phrase "ayzoh". Now, you notice Bobby on the other side of the house with his head buried in his feet lying down and probably waiting for you to move into no man's land. Bobby is not happy with you being there but he ain't showing it. If Bobby could smile, he would be like, "I swear…alenakesem…come on in".  "ager Tena belen" as we start to walk towards our destination, Bobby gets up and starts running towards you. It takes you 3.2 seconds to realize that you are in deep ****. Bobby would chase your ass all over the freaking place. Don't expect the owner to react and help you right away. That would be too right. No…they would laugh until they realize Bobby is about to grab your "shiro yenefawen behind"….

..bad memory! bad memory!...Go away! Go away!

Now, Snakes? I don't think so!