aqumada

-         It’s nearly been 5 months since my relocation to this conservative Midwest city where a single anti-Bush comment brings on the lynching mob. He is the most notable messiah here followed by Jesus, Rusmsfeld and the Dick, in that specific order.

-         The greatest reminder that I am far removed from New York is the fact I have managed to rent my own apartment without the need to have any roommates. However, my minimalist abesha nature has kicked in full force and has become very evident. To start with, I have no furniture in my apartment. I was sleeping on the floor for the first three months after my arrival then yekolotemari decided to visit so I ended up buying two air mattresses. On the colder days, I have a gabi that comes in handy, otherwise I just pass out on the air mattress (often times naked). I have a bedroom but I have no clue what it looks like at night. I haven’t needed it so far since the living room has been serving as the bedroom. I have no kitchen utensils whatsoever but I have paper cups and plates for those times when someone unexpectedly shows up (after all, I now know at least 10 abesha folks in this city). The cups will be good for the tap water or soda but I have no clue what will end up on the paper plates. Medical books and half read medical articles are strewn all over the living room floor while the kitchen counter is filled with empty cans of diet Sunkist. The most fucked up part is that I still think I’m living large. I must have issues I need to work on.

-         The white coat I was given when I started work has my name, title and the specialty of medical field I’m in embroidered on it in bright red. No doubt that’s what grabs people’s attention first. About a month ago a daughter of a patient I had been taking care of stopped me in a hallway and said “since I’m a teacher I will probably never drive the kind of car you drive but I can just about imagine it”. Comments of this sort are about the only things that bring a smile to my face. My reply to her was “honey, I wish I were good at sugarcoating things, but you’re probably right and I honestly don’t think you will ever drive the kind of car I drive”. This is the first time I have become a salaried employee which means I had worked so hard and finally managed to make myself part of the work force who don’t qualify for overtime pay. What an irony?! Congress had also felt so bad at one time for physicians who are doing their specialty training, they ended up passing a law that prohibited us from working more than 80 hours per week. Big fuckin’ deal!!! Even if employers strictly followed the rules, that’s still 16 hour-days day in day out for years. Anyway, every month after taxes I get a check for $2500 and assuming I only work 80 hours a week, my earning comes to $7.80 an hour. Is it possible perhaps, this is why I drive a thousand dollar Dodge Neon that is 10 years old? Damn it! I dare you to drive the kind of car I drive. I told you I’m a minimalist abesha. Don’t you dare compete with me. Back in the old country I used to walk to school and then back home everyday. I walked it backwards, 20 miles each way, bare foot and uphill both ways.

-         80 hours per week? Really? Well, here is my schedule from next Sunday (11/19) until the coming Sunday (11/26). (Note: In the surgical intensive care, every time I am on call, it is a 30 hour shift). Lucky for me, I’m on call on Sunday (11/19) then I’m on call on Tuesday, then I’m on call on Thursday and then I’m on call on Sunday (11/26). That is 30 hours per shiftt x 4 shifts which inexplicably comes to 80 hours per week (this must be the sort of fuzzy math Bush used to talk about during the election). In case you were wondering, I’m on call again on Monday the 28^th.

-         There is this great abesha saying that roughly translates to “If you intentionally take a spill, you have no room to complain when you get stepped on” so I am not complaining about the work schedule since I was fully cognizant that it would suck big time. I mentioned it above because I needed a good segue to respond to one of the comments left in yekolotemari’s last article about not all jobs being created equal. Someone wanted to know how many interns, physicians, medical students and nurses I have had the opportunity to fornicate with so far. I am really sad to disappoint my fans out there but I have to say Wegesha has not been his old self for the last few months. When I finally go home after completing a 30 hour shift, I don’t even think about food and as those who know me well can attest, I have always put food over women (this is also true in a literal sense if you consider whip cream  and chocolate syrup to be food).

-         Before I started this job/training/residency, I sought the advice of my ex who had gone through a surgical residency training before I. Allow me to digress and say “we need more of them” – abesha women surgeons. Anyway, she once told me habits that weren’t bolted down solidly before residency had a tendency to fly away once residency started. (Please, get over it! Yes, there have been daring abesha women who had gotten close to me in the past. The fact they had all dumped me is beside the point). My point here is, I listened to her and started taking my fat lazy ass to the gym and worked out regularly before residency. Since starting this job I have gained 10 pounds and I only discovered where the hell the gym is located only about 4 days ago. A 10 pound gain in about 5 months translates to a gain of 25 pounds in one year. So 25 pounds per year x 7 years comes to about . . . 80 hours/week (in a non-fuzzy math kind of way).

-         I get no comfort to hear from my senior colleagues this is the best year I will have and things will get worse next year. Yesterday, when I was about to leave work after being on call, a colleague who had been on call with me asked a whole bunch of us (including very senior physicians), how many of us would choose to go into the profession of medicine if we got the opportunity to do this shit all over again and out of about 8 physicians and 3 medical students there was only one medical student who raised her hand. Let’s hope it gets better. It is hard to believe so many people in the profession think their job sucks. I know these days there are many medical shows on TV but I haven’t seen any of them and I am starting to get curious to see how they portray the residents on these shows.

-         Last but not least, I have heard there is an abesha girl who is doing her specialty training in brain surgery somewhere around Portland. Taking the risk of sounding too out of touch with the times I will still say “You go girl!!!” Emmm….wa! (If you think a kiss from Wegesha is a curse, then I take it back).